Today I'd like to discuss something near and dear to my heart-Parenthood. In my twelve plus years of experience I must admit I've become quite the authority! Thankfully, I have no official pedigree or PhD so I may share my "uninformed opinions" without fear of serious retribution.
I truly believe today's parenting or lack thereof is directly related to our declining moral fabric in society, I find it idiotic to believe we have progressed so far that there is nothing left to learn from our predecessors. The new age "children are basically programmed and will find their own path" type parents should be beaten publicly for all to see.You can go to any local jail or prison to acquaint yourself with adults that were not exposed to positive,structured, family culture as children. Unruly kids are a direct reflection of lazy parents and will almost assuredly be underachieving/unhappy adults.
It's actually very simple. Common sense, Structure, and a Warm Heart are your best tools for raising your children. It is not our job to be our kids' friends. You can travel that road when your children are your age! Until then, walk the line and find your own friends at the bar like normal adults. Bottom line is it's on us folks to shape our kids ideas on respect, humility, and appreciation. We need to instill the desire to succeed and travel a righteous path at the same time. A skill which seems almost like an old wives tale nowadays.
Now back to parents that need a flogging: The parent whose goal is to not be embarrassed, "Oh, they'll be fine in a minute just ignore them" isn't always your best option. There are times when negative as well as positive reinforcement is, I'm sorry to say, absolutely necessary. The," I absolutely do not yell and don't ever give my child so much as a slap on the hand" school of thought is just not realistic. Call me crazy but a quick slap on the hand to firmly demonstrate the need to steer clear of the stove is far less traumatic to the psyche of a toddler than a pot of boiling water. I'm certainly not trying to glorify or encourage corporal punishment but I am a fan of common sense approaches to child-rearing. I also see nothing wrong with a firm menacing tone, even a low roar if your child is acting like a horse's ass at the grocery store. They should be embarrassed and it should be of no concern if your tone attracts attention. The other parents should not be your focus.
Now obviously if you are a "hard-line, always kick ass and take names parent" you will fail miserably. Again, Common sense, Structure, and a Warm Heart are key. You must be caring and loving unselfishly with your child. If you are not a physically affectionate person you need to learn to be. A warm embrace and a sympathetic tone is sometimes all your child needs. If your parents didn't openly show affection and you're not used to that type of thing, tough shit! Tell it to your counselor and be sure your kids do not suffer because of past mistakes.
Love your kids folks. Talk to them. Listen to them, and most importantly take the time to enjoy them. Until next time...
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